songs from my closet

my phone is a fucking burning ember in my pocket.

//
i am
\\
DONE
//
with living
//
in a
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fantasy world.
//
It has gotten old.
\\
And is no longer appreciated.
//
Thanks for helping me out when I needed you, other world.
\\
Time to get my head out of the clouds and face things as they are.
//


d.

today started a new and exciting thing for me: simplifying my life. and what's weird, is that in order for me to simplify, i have to pick up simple things to replace my complex ones. for example, i have about a bazillion backpacks (sac a dos en francais). wouldn't it be so much cooler if we called a backpack, a sac a dos? i think so. anywho. i got one of those trendy incase backpacks today, in a dashing muted green that reminds me of rain boots. it's absolutely fabulous (i loved that show on bbc). now the reason i chose that particular backpack is because its very slim, even though you can put loads of stuff in it. AND most importantly, it has a faux fur lining for my mac and phone and a ipad (if i had one). it was overpriced, yes. but hey, i guess i'm simplifying my wallet too, but getting rid of money. haha.
//
i'm going to sell and donate a lot of stuff soon. i am tired of having things i don't need. i want to have one of everything, not seven. i'm hoping that this will make me appreciate what i have more. for example, i won't be getting an ipod like i've wanted, because i have massive storage on my iphone and it would be a mega waste. i also decided against the super mad hip paul rodriguez incase skate pack because...ding ding ding (!!!), i don't skate. and yes, i would have looked a bit foolish. i'm also not getting an ipad. i don't need to live in a virtual world anymore than i already do. i want to use my headphones less, and listen to real sounds more. sounds created by physical vibrations in the current world...not in a studio.
\\
one thing that i do look forward to getting soon is a new calender. i have a surfing calender right now, and it is pretty stellar. i wonder if nme.com makes calenders or perhaps and icelandic calender? who knows.
//
thanks for reading.
\\


dillydally.

it's true. i think people can mind read. it's kind of sad. i have whole conversations in my head with people, and then look up and realize that they're still standing there with no clue. if they could just read my mind, i'd be free of a lot of stress.
//
i think that when a person is thinking something exciting, they shouldn't hold it in all the time. because that will turn them into play-dough ice cubes (and not the cool kind with the holes in the middle).
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that's it.
//
go listen to matt & kim. it will make you feel better.
\\

d.

FUCK. FUCK FUCK FUCK.
IT'S SO HARD, NOT TO SAY.




fuck.

\\
i am enjoying the cold weather for one reason, and one reason only: i get to layer. it makes me more boxy, and have less curves, and appear more boyish. other than that, it totally blows. mainly due to the fact that it makes everyone slow down a few beats. people around me seem to trudge through each moment as though they are polar bears swimming through spinach. (just had that image in my head).
//
my weekend was.............dismal. i went home. which usually isn't great, and was particularly bad. i was shocked to be referred to as 'she' or 'her.' mainly because i don't feel like that at all. i think i'm made massive strides in my mental and emotional transition.
\\
in other news, i've been listening to some pretty killa tuneage lately. i'm trying out some jurassic 5, which is far from sucking. as well as matthew dear, which is higher on the sucking scale.
//
i'm looking at new majors at school. it's about time i find one. right now, i'm pretty set on electronic production and design. my school's website says this about the major:
[
The student majoring in Electronic Production and Design will master the musical and creative use of electronic production and sound design tools and technologies. Working in professional-level 5.1-equipped studios, classroom/labs, and performance spaces, students will study electronic composition/production, synthesizer programming, sound design techniques, interactive performance systems, digital signal processing, audio programming, alternate controllers, music with integrated visuals, and more.
]
i dunno about you, but that sounds pretty fucking awesome to me. since i missed the deadline for the application for the spring, i'll have to apply in a few months for the summer/fall semesters.
\\
well that's what's up with this kid. peace out playaaaas.
//

dylan.

On a silver river
You illuminate the whole world and blue eyes
Cut the starry sky
I make a wish and close my eyes
Yes do that, now begins the story
Oh no

At lightspeed
Inside a heart explodes, an airplane crash
Down on the earth sings
I make a wish and close my eyes
Yes do that, a silly dance
All is forgotten in very little time and yet begins
Open eyes
Oh no

My best friend no matter whatever happens
I swallow tears and breathe hair
A bad break, we cry in each other arms
When we meet
The lips burning, we hold hands
I see you wake
Inside me a lunatic sings
Always rushing, we run quickly
Everything becomes smaller
I scream louder
I'm with a shell, going away

SIGUR ROS

-- dyl.

who said you have to wait for T to start getting weird bumps in your arms? not i.
/
this is a little bit from sigur ros', hoppipolla:
Smiling
Spinning 'round and 'round
Holding hands
The whole world a blur
But you are standing

Soaked
Completely drenched
No rubber boots
Running in us
Want to erupt from a shell.
\

thank you.

dylan.